Staggering statistics...still widely under-reported

One of 4 women report domestic or sexual abuse in their lifetimes. While that statistic is appauling, still it is grossly under-reported by women and men. Women are sometimes the batterers. And countless men with great respect for their mothers and and women in general, strongly hold values they will not hit a woman even if triggered. Each person deserves to be treated with dignity and respect. Men, if you are in a relationship with a woman who is physically abusive towards you...LEAVE and stay away until she gets treatment. Your quiet toleration is a dis-service to you and your partner. Speak out to break the cycle and the violence. Even more widely un-reported, it is nearly impossible to gauge the extent of physical abuse at the hands of adult women.

Women who are abused are unlikely to admit it, even if you ask her. Even if she is your sister or your best friend. There are many reasons for this...most correlate to the shame of a battered woman. We don't tell family and friends. We don't prosecute, and the abuse doesn't stop.

While abuse is active, the abuser uses various emotional leverage to keep the abused quiet. In my case, my abuser convinced me that if I spoke against him, that put whoever I spoke to at risk. Not only would I face further torture, others who knew his truth would be subject to intimidation and threats against themselves and those they loved. While in the midst of abuse, WE BELIEVE our abusers have this power over us.

Perhaps more frequently, we think if only we can get out of the situation... without fully realizing the abuser will move onto his next prey without intervention. Admittedly, the prosecution process is tedious, strenuous, and incredibly difficult at times. Only with prosecution/intervention is their an opportunity to break the cycle. Again, without intervention an abuser will continue mistreating others until he/she is stopped.

Four states lack basic reporting and protection: WASHINGTON, GEORGIA, NEBRASKA, and OKLAHOMA. In these four states, abuse is even more likely to go unreported because even if an individual arrives in the emergency room with a gunshot or knife wound sustained in a domestic incident, POLICE are not mandated to respond!

I hope readers are outraged! The basic Survivor On A Mission website will be operating within a couple weeks and will include sample letters/e-mails and addresses to representatives in the four states that deserve reporting consistent with the rest of the country. Readers, please forward this link to people you know and love in these four states. Your assistance in mobilizing an army of advocates will make an important difference. In the meantime, do remember the National Hotline has trained staff continuously available to answer your questions at 1-800-799-SAFE. Your comments are always welcome...your thoughts and experiences add value to this blog. I LOVE YOU. BE SAFE!